Everyday,  Trauma Parenting,  Travel

Vacation?

First rule one should never forget…

Holidays = trauma behaviors

It is almost Thanksgiving. I live in a home filled with children that have, for whatever reason, been separated from their birth families. No matter the circumstances that got them here, that is HARD. Let’s take a moment to appreciate that for each of them. 

Annually, we all head out as a family for Thanksgiving. I do this for a bunch of reasons, by primarily, self care. November is historically rough for me emotionally, it’s also coming off a crazy time for me at work, and the wrap up of some very demanding kid activities. 

We arrived at our destination a bit after 4pm. Around 5pm, I was trying to diffuse an explosive child. By 5:40pm I was standing next to my car, in some poor unsuspecting neighbors driveway, offering said explosive kid medication to try to calm her and negotiate her into the car. In that moment, I’m thankful those neighbors didn’t call the police and give me yet one more thing to deal with on my “vacation”. 

Hubby is about six steps past angry. Based on his ears being a vibrant shade of fire engine red, I’d guess he’s ready to lose what’s left of his composure. Contrary to popular belief, I’m actually the calm one in the house, probably second only to Mr. Gatsby. In typical fashion, I’m stuck in the middle of a trauma child and my husband, who struggles in the moment to fully appreciate that a good portion of the drama around here isn’t voluntary. Once he comes down from the immediate stress of the situation, he’s all good. In the moment, I just feel like I’m stuck between two totally dysregulated people. It’s a crappy spot to be in, and we’ve yet to find something that works, because I can’t get either one of the dysregulated to remove themselves. (Open to suggestion here.)

I’m sure tomorrow will bring some other form of excitement. Hubby and I are sleeping in what I’m fairly sure is a double bed this evening. Given his snoring, paired with his tendency to practice unconscious acrobatics each night, I expect to sleep even less than usual. 

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